10 July 2006

Baal Habos

When I came across a fast moving blog and had the urge to post something, I quickly conjured up a very nondescript name out of the air with the intention of coming up with something a little more creative at a future date. Perhaps something that might describe the type of Baal Habos I was, or some hobby that I was really into. Or some name that invoked some grandiose image. But as it turns out "Baal Habos" is perfect. Because the path that life brought me down is really one that could happen to any of you Baal Habattim out there.

You see, I didn't go out looking for any sort of skepticism. I really toed the line. Unless you call "reading" a sin. I realize some of you might. But it's really not that unusual or atypical.

I really am one of you, in every way a very typical Baal Habos. As a child, I may have gone to camp with you or maybe I didn't.
OK, maybe I went to college and you didn't. Or maybe I learnt in Kolel and you did not. Or you're richer/poorer taller/shorter than me. Or maybe we're 10 years apart. But, I'm just a a very typical Baal Habos.

You would never in a million years have picked me as the one to go skeptic.


I sit right next to you in Shul. I might have even davened "far dem Umud" this past Shabbos. Ha, I might even be your Chavrusa. As we speak, you might be checking out my Tsotskele as a prospective mate for your Shaifele. I might already be your Mechuton/Mechitten. I might be your father.

And you don't have clue.

You think you'd be different if you'd be in my shoes? I don't think so.


So please, I beg you, don't judge me too harshly. Or for the skeptics out there, don't give me too much credit. I'm just me. And I tell you now, it's no picnic.

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    4 Comments:

    At July 11, 2006 6:19 PM, Blogger topshadchan said...

    Actually, someone in my shul figured me out.

    It doesnt really matter, since ive said the same in public.

    One reason for alias is to keep options open if I end up in the charedi taliban society.

    The other reason is so my wife doesnt think im wasting my time.

     
    At July 11, 2006 10:17 PM, Blogger Baal Habos said...

    > Actually, someone in my shul.


    Happy, that's a scary thought.
    How did that happen? By blogging? Or some things you've told people?I wasn't aware that you said your name anywhere.

    Your comments do seem a drop more neutral than mine. I think I got some people very upset with my "What does God want" story.

    I actually had that tale in my mind for years and it was cathartic to publish it.

     
    At July 12, 2006 12:26 PM, Blogger topshadchan said...

    BHB
    We both had the same principal (toras emes kaminetz) and that principal was initially accused anonymously on a blog of being a physical abuser.

    I complained to the website owner in the comments, and he took it off.

    This guy had read that comment, and put two and two together.

    Oh well.

    As you point out, im more nuetral, and very happy in this lifestyle.
    I just could never stand the rigidness of those who insisted my way or the highway.
    The culture of death, because the whole yiddishkeit is trying to scare the bejesus out of you.

    It doesnt work. I now understand why chazal said that fearing hashem is harder than loving hashem.
    Fear means acknowledgement of the liklyhood of the punishment. If you dont find the threats believeable, you wont fear.

    Love means you see value. We migrate to value added services. Its natural.

     
    At July 12, 2006 10:45 PM, Blogger Baal Habos said...

    Happy , thats a pretty spooky tale. I'm purposely being vague on details that are identifying. I too have the publising ith now. I hope I get over it before I give myself away. I think even people close to me who read my blog will not suspect.

     

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